trillow:

my cat licked my forehead and then tapped it with her paw i think i just got baptised

(via bbelair)

rnioda:

*stabs you in the chest* why are u screaming i said april fools wtf calm down

(via thelostpirate)

whorville:

A great way to break the ice is by smashing it with the heads of your enemies

(via thelostpirate)

yugoslavic:

i had no idea this site cost 1.1 billion i bet its because of my blog 

(via toinfinittyandbeeyond)